Freedom from - Stuff

In preparation for the big move, I am going through milk crates full of papers, reading material and guides from my college and graduate school years. I haven't looked at this stuff in years, and if I am honest with myself, which I am trying to be, I must admit that most of these things have no place in my life anymore. I do not need papers written in languages I no longer speak, I do not need the many hundreds of poems and excerpts from texts, grammar guides and other academic materials.

Heaven knows I don't need all of the notes I took in six years of classes. Most of my scribble is illegible anyway, and looking through several dozen notebooks, I'm not even sure what I was taking notes about.

I know why I have held on to this stuff for so many years (I got my BA in 1991, MA in 1996). It represents countless sleepless nights, numerous hours of study and pontifications really, that lead to some sort of growth. Although I have forgotten many facts, I have retained some notions of what I was supposed to have learned. My University years were really fantastic. Although I am currently doing nothing even remotely akin to my studies, these experiences stay with me forever. It is really difficult to give up the physical evidence.

I am keeping some things though - like all of my yearbooks, and all of the research I did on Christa Wolf through the years. I worked hard to gather, categorize and learn from these materials, and since I am still pursuing my interest in her works, I am keeping the binders I made. I have filled up one milk crate (stollen from the UDF in Springfield, OH) of things I can't part with. One milk crate down from three. Not bad, right?

I carried the two lawn and leaf bags full of remnants of my six years of academic study out to the dumpsters in the back. Being a packrat, part of me is unsure if this was the right thing to do. What if I need this information someday? What if I suddenly want to give up a paying career and get my Ph.D. in German language and literatures?

But mostly, I feel less burdoned. I feel very crowded by all that I have managed to accumulate in the four years I have lived in this apartment, and I am determined to do a lot of weeding out.